top of page


"The Soul always knows what to do to heal itself, the challenge is to silence the mind". - Caroline Myss It was March 2010, I sat in a diner in Long Island, scribbling my meager finances on a rough piece of paper, contemplating life. I was wading through waves of grief & struggling to get my head above water.

My father in law had died suddenly in January, after complications from a knee surgery. I was living pay check to pay check for years now, I had no savings. I graduated with a Master's degree in Education the previous summer & I was genuinely confused why everything hadn't "fallen in to place". In the construct that was my life, I was under the illusion that having made all the sacrifices & ticked all the boxes, I was now entitled to get something back from the world right? In reality however, the economy had tanked & increasing numbers of teachers across all districts in Long Island were getting pink slips.

I was desperate for change, the soft but consistent whispers from the wild woman within were getting louder & harder to ignore. Willingly sharing her wisdom, the medicine I needed was to explore, travel & return to Nature. I was being called by something within to heal but my mind was very adept at misdirection away from life's possibilities, feeling safer in a life based on probability. My student visa did not permit employment on the books, so how could an unpredictable income of an undocumented Irish waitress at a small greasy spoon in Long Island, make travelling the world possible?

The chef in the kitchen was ringing the bell angrily, order was up. Head above water for a moment, I looked up from my note pad & despite having worked in the converted rail car for years now, something that had gone completely unnoticed, was shining brightly. The diner with its stainless steel siding & streamlined structure made a cheap attempt to replicate a nostalgic & retro styled diner experience. This place with its barrel vault roofline, tiled floors, glass blocks & Formica had been my home for 4 years, but the neon trimmed map of the USA highlighting popular attractions across the country, on this night, seemed to shine more brightly than ever. With the bell ringing louder & now accompanied by some inaudible yelling, I had a sudden realization that there was one way I could satisfy my Soul's SOS, cradle my mind's fears & stretch my very limited budget. I scribbled "buy a tent & a map" across my financial notes, carefully folded it, placed it in my apron with deep intention & ran to the kitchen to collect my order with a new lust for life. I bought a map of the USA & a tent that afternoon, after what turned out to be a particularly profitable overnight work shift. Over the course of the next 8 weeks a dot indicated places of interest to visit and with a mini van packed, the night before departure for this epic trip, the dots were joined & the road trip of a life time began.


This week was a reminder of that amazing young woman who was willing to listen to her inner genius without needing an explanation. She blindly stumbled onto a path that would ensure she healed & evolved, with an open hearted willingness to recognize & embrace the understanding a healing crisis may not be convenient or comfortable, but it is always necessary. I needed every bit of her courage & bravery this week.

I woke up Tuesday morning after a particularly amazing sleep, a direct result of a very beautiful energy treatment I received on Monday, from a dear friend in Germany. However, as my morning progressed I found myself quickly back in bed. I was in such extreme pain from contractions in my lower back/lower belly. Despite my many years of healing & deep shadow work an old pattern was quickly rearing its ugly head - anesthesia & amnesia - "how do I numb the pain & crack on with life?".

I can say now in retrospect, with much gratitude, my body would not comply with this order of the mind & after a few deep breaths was much more willing to support the quiet voice of the Soul. I was in a healing crisis, being reminded how incredibly multilayered & complex we all are & if I was willing, a deeper connection to my body was waiting, new layers ready to be peeled away, new thresholds to move through.


In order to move through a death process (healing crisis), we need to listen to our hearts, give time & space to the inner voice without belittling or shutting ourselves down. We must meet ourselves with curiosity, compassion & honesty, Matt Licata beautifully explains that we do not need to suppress the pathology that is sure to come with the energetic deep cleans of a healing crisis, but instead endure the paving of a new path.

Using the breath as a bridge between the body & mind, I began to compassionately listen to the language of my body, I held space for the information my body was offering up - physically, emotionally & mentally. I stopped ridiculing, judging & shaming myself. I stayed open to evolving & expanding from this process, stayed open to the possibility of becoming more whole & wholesome because I was actively releasing that which was weighing me down.

For five days I surrendered, endured & chose to follow the rules of Nature. I rested, stayed off my feet, I prayed, I meditated, I practice pranayama & yoga Nidra, I ate only when I was hungry, I hydrated, I laughed at my ordeal & most importantly I cried. Then the most remarkable thing started to happen. I very vividly & clearly relived the week I gave birth to my daughter. The Pitocin, the contractions, the self judgements I carried around "giving in" to an epidural & why I needed to "take so long" to dilate fully. The recovery from the entire ordeal & how I didn't honor myself with rest, with love. The shame around my milk not coming in & the story I have carried about "not breast feeding enough", as well as many other unprocessed, repressed memories that emerged.

This week I grieved deeply for this version of myself that I abandoned. I was dared to love myself unconditionally & invite her Home. This woman no longer needed to live on the outskirts of my psyche, where she had been banished in my rushed attempts to return to regularly scheduled program of my pre baby life. I was irrevocably changed on all levels in the first week of August in 2014 but it wasn't until this week in 2021 that I fully acknowledged & embodied this particularly painful & grueling duel with Death. Only open wounds heal, this spiral learning to a deeper understanding of myself made me feel incredibly vulnerable, but I have emerged lighter, softer, more compassionate, less judgmental & more able to praise the gift of Life.


There is such amazing intelligence held in every cell of our body & if we allow, the wisdom that becomes available after a Five Element Acupuncture or Integrated Energy Therapy treatment will lead us down a path to the highest expression of ourselves. As we eliminate trauma imprints in the form of energy blockages (i.e. toxins) from our cells, tissues & the nervous system, it is transported by the blood to our organs of elimination, but often before these toxins reach their final destination they register in our body as pain & dis-comfort. A strong rebirth & healthier rejuvenation will occur as a result of this internal houseclean to efficiently replace that which was broken down during treatments. This clean out & detoxification will manifest in the days shortly after your treatment, according to Dr. Hering's Law of Cure.

The Law of Cure states that healing progresses in three stages - firstly, from the deepest part of the body – the mental and emotional levels and the vital organs to the external extremities such as the skin. Secondly, symptoms heal in the reverse of their original chronological order of appearance, so a brief encounter with a past affliction may occur. Finally that healing progresses from the upper to the lower parts of the body, The Law of Cure is not always as extreme as my shared experience this week, in fact this was my most difficult processing to date & I assert an exception, not typically the rule, for post treatment integration

The Soul ALWAYS strives to produce health unless we undermine it's effort to throw off the old & bring in the new. As Michael Meade so eloquently states “Those who seek for pearls must be willing to dive to the depths time and time again. Once in the depths things appear differently, and each descent requires an inner adjustment in order to see what is otherwise hidden from view. People expect beautiful things to come in an attractive wrapper, but the soul has it another way. The hidden beauty works its way from inside out and must be sensed within before it can be displayed for all to see." Beauty did not arrive for me this week in a package with a bow, it arrived as a grief. Grief that I carefully & lovingly re-stitched back into the fabric of my being. I required this death to fuel my ability to live fully & authentically. Stephen Jenkinson describes grief as a carefully developed skill, with its twin being the ability to praise life - to praise everything, even the things that you don't directly benefit from. In this way, as twins, where one is authentically embodied, the other is very close at hand. This week grief & a deep appreciation of life were my honored guests. Together we toasted & clinked glasses & until the time comes when my Deathwalk ends, this week reminded me of the importance to truly live well. Book an appointment online:



Commenting has been turned off.
bottom of page